Racism in the Sex Industry

Adult Entertainment remains one of the most controversial industries in the United States that few find social merit in being associated with in any regard. Even though this industry is one of the social taboos, it produces about US$15 billion per year in revenue. This industry is peppered with various fetishes to suit the taste of the consumer appetite.

However, besides the high revenues and eye-candy that comes from this industry, there are enormous social costs. According to many of the statistics from health and welfare agencies, a good percentage of the women and men within the industry had some sort of sexual or physical abuse throughout their childhood. The adult entertainment industry would of course deny many of the facts provided by the agencies that have to rehabilitate and care for those discarded after the fact.

The Internet provides a platform for many of the sexual fantasies come alive. These sexual interest covers a broad range of fetishes from bondage to humiliation and all points in between. However, due to the polarization of the nation since 2008 because of economic and even racial tensions, a few trends have intensified over the last four years. African-American and Latin women are appearing in more adult videos on many of the adult tube sites that involves humiliation based solely on race and ethnicity. There are a few particular sites that will remain nameless in order to avoid giving them unwarranted publicity openly exploits young African-American women in degrading fashion.

The most disturbing aspect of these sites is that the African-American women are particularly humiliated with over-tones of slavery to put it mildly. After enduring hours of the most uncomfortable of circumstances, it was apparent that these women signed contracts and knew very little about the humiliation and torture they would have to endure. In some cases the women were referred to by the N Word, spat upon directly in the face, forced to undertake forced violent oral copulation, probed with fingers in the mouth until vomiting into a dog-bowl and then forced to drink it. These are just some of the mentionable feats. The age range of these women seemed to be from 19 years of age up to age 50 and one thing that paralleled between all of them, they were shocked by the way they were treated and called. Almost all of them ended the videos in tears and ashamed.

The fundamental disconnect is that these women are taking on these risk by appearing in these videos for two basic reasons that is closely based on age. The younger women are usually lured due to the money and the potential of becoming a porn-star i.e. attention. The older women ranging from single mothers to ladies of the night do it for the money. Sadly, upon contacting a couple of the women that appeared in the videos, they left the whole adult entertainment scene for good. A lady in her 30’s told me that she did it for the money about US$1,300 in cash for a half-hour of work. She mentioned that the half-hour wound-up being almost two days and multiple Caucasian men. She mentioned that one man said “I’m gonna’ make you need a therapist you Nword”. Unlike the other women I chatted with she decided to get counseling and move on with her life.

One thing that I gathered from the conversation is that she did not realize how she compromised her dignity after watching the tape play-back. She asked me never to contact her again regarding the subject-matter. The other younger woman thought that it was love after coming from an abusive environment. Before I could contact her again, she changed or closed her email account.

In the United States there is freedom of expression and therefore as I write this article some young minority woman has fallen victim to this form of exploitation. It should be clear that these are not young dumb teenagers, but women motivated by emotional pain and a quest for attention and economic desire or need. It should be also noted that Filipina and Latin women are also exploited in this way.

There are some women that fully understand the circumstances and situations this lifestyle brings and therefore they rarely complain and criticize others who do. This does not make it right or acceptable, but just a means of justification. In many cases these women were hurt before going on camera and the humiliation they endure only complicates matters or justify the abuse they had received in the past.

The clean porn industry that tries to present a more conventional and packaged approach toward main-stream acceptance also find these enterprises as counter-productive toward their cause and rarely does it condone the aforementioned practices. The interesting reality is that this article began as a Google search and revealed an aspect of our society in this regard. Also, other ethnic women are treated according to the social stereo-types by these sleazy operators.

The only way to effectively to combat this problem will be an effort among communities and families to build the self-esteem of women to avoid the trap that leads to nothing more than another experience of exploitation. One interesting thing that I have noticed upon reading about many of these sites is that rarely is the same woman used more than twice due to the number of women waiting to participate in the practice.

In short, this is a social issue that is trending and may not improve as the nation becomes more polarized. Education is the key to avoid these women from ruining their lives and those of their families.

 

Did you know that the future of porn is vr porn? To find out more please see vr porn tube.

Sex Advice – Improve Your Sex Life Like an Olympic Athlete

Sex is not always a sport and, although sex games and sex positions abound, it should never be a competition. However, if you want to become a gold medalist in bed, you can’t expect to sit back and hope that the best sex of your life descends on you by magic or is somehow passed down through the genes of your ancestors. You have to train.

Superstar coaches of practically every sport on the planet train their aspiring athletes with the same basic principle. No matter what the sport, competition, or activity, the best training always consists of two essential parts: mental and physical. Training must be 50% mental and 50% physical.

The physical 50% is the kind everyone who has ever watched a sports movie is all too familiar with. In sports, it involves those ten-mile hikes through the mud in the rain at 5 AM. It involves charging through barriers made of foam, stepping through gauntlets made of tires, and passing the ball back and forth until it becomes second nature.

In the arena of adult sex, the physical 50% means that you need to get as much practice as you possibly can. Know your own body like… the back of your hand. Get to know the body or bodies of your spouse, partner, or friends with benefits until you can trace them in your sleep. Don’t expect to have mind-blowing sex every time right away. Expect only to practice.

But just like in any sport, the physical 50% is not enough.

For athletes, the mental 50% involves both watching other professionals perform the right way the actions they hope to excel at and also playing back the tapes of their own performances in order to spot their own weak areas. The mental 50% is all about studying, immersing their minds in the sport, activity, or action so much so that when they get on the field, their bodies automatically follow suit.

In sex, the mental 50% can be accomplished in a number of ways.

Reading is one of the easiest ways to train your mind in the art of sex. Sex advice is readily available in large and free quantities online, so find a sex blog or sex advice portal that you love and visit it often.

Playing the tapes back is another great way to get in the mental 50%, so don’t be ashamed to find some tasteful erotica and take notes. If your partners or friends with benefits are adventurous enough, you may find it equal parts enjoyable and educational to film yourselves in various states of undress performing various sex positions and sexual acts. When you watch yourselves later, you can highlight the things you did that really made your partner scream as well as make a mental note of the things they did that sent shivers through your spine.

As you sculpt your body and your mind for the best sex of your life, don’t forget what sex is essentially all about – having fun and connecting with your partner. In sex and sports alike, perfection is never guaranteed, only improvement.

Missing Persons Investigations of a New Age

George Orwell’s novel Nineteen Eighty-Four was first published in 1949. You’d have thought that his vision would no longer be up-to-date 65 years later. The world he described was a world where Big Brother was watching people, constantly seeking information about crime think or any other kind of offence against the glorious super state of Oceania.

Edward Snowden showed us, that what Big Brothers these days are doing is not all that different from what Orwell described. Sure, the technology is quite different from what he had envisioned, but Orwell’s novel is not about science and technology, but about the horrible world where governments might monitor our every move, observe us in our most intimate moments and know about everything we do. Modern day supercomputers, satellites and all sorts of technology make that easily possible for various government agencies.

Yet there is so much information out there that is easily accessible without any spying satellites, supercomputers or without bugging mobile phones. It’s the information millions of users are putting online every day of their own free will, just to get some likes, re-tweets or shares. People tell themselves that they are doing this to stay in touch with each other, but they fail to realize how much of their personal information they are giving away every moment of every day.

With more than half of Australians being active on Facebook, it seems like this would be the most promising social network to start an investigation. The information found on Facebook is truly varied. There are photographs, comments as well as check-ins that give away a person’s current location. Furthermore there is a time stamp on everything, which makes it easy to create a collage of events a person went through at a certain time. No special equipment is needed for all of this with much of it capable of being performed with a simple smart phone.

Of course people tend to forget, that social media doesn’t mean just Facebook and Twitter. Apart from other household names like LinkedIn, Google+ or Pinterest, there are dozens of other smaller, niche websites that cater to all sorts of profiles. Finding information across all of these platforms can turn into a large investigation on its own.

Investigating social media is not only about snooping either. People tend to forget, that Facebook is first and foremost a platform for communication. As many people from the younger generations no longer even have a landline and choose not to publicly reveal their mobile number, Facebook and other social media may be an easy way of tracking them down for communication or to even serve court documents.

Being a private investigator and not knowing anything about social media is something that has become unimaginable in this day and age. While traditional methods such as surveillance are still very effective, they are considerably supplemented with comprehensive desktop investigation based on extensive social media profiling and as the next generation moves more of their life onto the internet the value of this brand of profiling is only going to increase.

Ecommerce – The Importance of Having a Privacy Policy

A privacy policy, also known as an information management policy, is an agreement between a website operator and a website user that determines how the operator intends to use, collect, store, share, and protect the data that the user shares through interactions with the website. Even a little more than a decade ago, some commercial websites did not have privacy policies, but now, virtually all websites have one. These policies, which should be separate from the website’s terms of use agreement, are a necessity for several different reasons.

The Policy Can Foster Transparency and Trust between Operators and Users

In connection with privacy policies, website users usually want to know two things: what information the website collects and how that information is used. Best business practices dictate that website operators let users know the answers to those two questions and let them know how to control that use.

Some websites inform users that they simply collect information for their own use, and other websites disclose that they provide that information to third parties under certain circumstances. eBay’s privacy policy, for instance, tells users that it does not “disclose your personal information to third parties for their marketing and advertising purposes” without the user’s explicit consent. The policy says eBay may share personal information to third parties when it is necessary to prevent fraud or use the eBay website’s core functions. The extended version of eBay’s reader-friendly policy could be improved by specifically informing users at what points of service the information is collected and how it is shared at each point.

A website should also update users whenever the privacy policy changes. It should let the users know when the new policy will go into effect, and it may allow users to agree to the changes, explicitly through a dialogue box or implicitly through continued use of the website.

The Policy Can Help Shield You from Legal Liability

Although there is no general federal law outlining privacy policy requirements for websites that collect information from adults, several state laws and minor-specific federal laws exist. For instance, the California Online Privacy Protection Act of 2003 (OPPA) requires that website privacy policies must contain certain information, including: “personally identifying information collected, the categories of parties with whom this personally identifying information may be shared, and the process for notifying users of material changes to the applicable privacy policy.” The Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) requires operators to maintain a privacy policy if the website is directed to children under the age of 13 or knowingly collects information from children under the age of 13.

Read for more for additional information regarding privacy policies, terms of use agreements, internet business, and eCommerce.

Darin M. Klemchuk is an intellectual property (IP) trial lawyer located in Dallas, Texas with significant experience enforcing patent, trademark, copyright, and trade secret rights. He is a founding partner of Klemchuk LLP. He was selected to be included in the Internet Lawyer Leadership Summit, a group of lawyers in the US focused on Internet law issues. He also practices commercial litigation and business law, social media law, and ecommerce and IP licensing.

Therapy for Sex Addiction: Dealing With Intimacy

Any definition, discussion or exploration of compulsive sexuality begins thusly:

“Sex addiction is an intimacy disorder characterized by” blah, blah, blah.

Then it goes on to name the symptoms: pre-occupation with thoughts sexual; persistent, unrelenting urges to sexually act out; continued use despite adverse consequences, loss of control and so forth.

Such definitions are frustratingly vague. While emphasis is given to the symptoms of sex addiction, the idea of it being “an intimacy disorder” never seems to be addressed. This is unfortunate, indeed. I think a “disordered” pattern of intimate relations is at the core and foundation of this debilitating syndrome.

Vanilla sex addiction, fetishism, exhibitionism/voyeurism, BDSM, and all the other various and moribund kinds of sexual perversions are fueled by the very basic (and healthy) motivation to connect.

Sadly, somehow or other, the urge to connect is misfired. Rather than seeking a real relationship with a real person who might, in fact, satisfy some of one’s real relational needs, the sexually compulsive tries to connect with the “unreal” in fantasy. It is a solo act. Sex, for a person who has a perversion or addiction, is always a narcissistic, self-centered endeavor. It is not related sex. The endorphin rush of the sexual high is so dear to them that it precludes any idea of sharing sexual pleasure with a cherished one in the service of enhancing a bond.

What is intimacy?

Let’s look at the word “intimacy”. From the dictionary: the word is derived from the Latin intima, meaning “inner” or “inner-most.” The definition suggests that to be intimate, you need to know your real self. This ability to be in touch with our inner core is a requisite to being intimate.

Our intima holds the innermost part of ourselves, our most profound feelings, our enduring motivations, our values, our sense of right and wrong and our most embedded convictions about life. Importantly, our intima also includes that which enables us to express these innermost aspects of our person to “the other”.

So, to be in relationship, and to know yourself/your partner sexually, you need to know and respect your intima. The intima is also the way in which we value and esteem ourselves and determines how we are with being with others. To put it simply, if don’t value yourself, you can’t value another. If you’re not aware of needs and wants, or are shamed by them, then sex becomes no more than a fuck.

I think every person I’ve ever seen in my consulting room for sexual compulsions suffers from estrangement from his intimus. We can survive the disapproval of others. The feeling can be painful, but it’s nothing compared to the disapproval of ourselves. Your personal well being and your ability to love another cannot survive your dislike or disrespect of yourself. If you dislike yourself, you’ll never be comfortable with your sexuality.

It bears repeating… the outstanding quality of intimacy is the sense of being in touch with our real selves. When “the other” also knows and is able to express his/her real self, intimacy happens. Sexuality is both an expression of that intimacy and a bond that enhances intimacy. With this kind of personal/sexual intimacy, our growth experience as humans is energized, enhanced, and fueled. Intimacy is the most meaningful and courageous of human experiences. It’s why people long for it so.

The Perils of Intimacy

However, despite this universal longing, fear and avoidance of intimacy is a reality for many people. People fear and even dread that which they most long for. No wonder there’s such a demand for psychotherapists!

So why would people fear, avoid or sabotage this wonderful thing called intimacy and, in the process, avoid person-related sex?

Sexual compulsion is the end point, the tip of the iceberg, if you will, of a long history of developmental events that begin in early attachment difficulties with caretakes, subsequent overwhelming experiences the child is unable to assimilate, an impaired ability to regulate feelings and impaired self-development.

The capacity for bonding with others is vital for human survival and well-being. Our capacity for intimacy is formed in the crucible of the first two years of life. Mothers that are needy, narcissistic, depressed, enmeshed (over-involved), distant, too protective, controlling, chronically angry, addicted to substances, frustrated with their husbands and displace their needs onto their children… raise children who have the psychic imprint of closeness as being dangerous. They also raise children who will carry self-hatred into their adult lives unless they get good treatment.

If the child’s need for attention, soothing, stimulation, affection, touch, discipline, validation, and so on goes unmet, or is met with feedback that is punishing, invalidating or rejecting, the consequences are woven into the structure of the developing personality. Such children may turn into themselves and disconnect from others, regulating their emotions through the use of substances or process addiction, like sex. They fail to learn to utilize others to soothe or comfort themselves. This increases the child’s vulnerability to mental health problems. These people actively seek familiar environmental interaction, thereby recreating and reenacting familiar early rejections and frustrations with others. They spend their lives further cementing their original isolation.

They develop a rigid defense system (boundaries, walls, turning inward to not need others) in order to psychologically survive. But what worked for them as children doesn’t work for them as adults. For these people, the vulnerability of intimacy harkens back to a time when they were vulnerable as children and they fear re-traumatization in their current relationship.

When a person like this is loved – seen in an affirmative light and encouraged to grow and change – this rigid defensive structure is threatened, so their psychological equilibrium is disrupted. Being loved is not congruent with the negative tapes they run about themselves. They can’t allow the reality of being loved to affect their basic defensive structure. Being vulnerable and open to change feels so threatening that they eschew close relationships and mature sexuality.

Entering into a relationship without having some resolution of childhood wounds results in various kinds of fear of intimacy: fear of being found inadequate, fear of engulfment, fear of the loss of control, fear of losing autonomy, fear of attack, fear of disappointment and betrayal, fear of guilt and fear of rejection and abandonment and so forth.

For this reason, I believe that current sex addiction therapy doesn’t go far enough. Focusing on symptom change techniques, such as relapse prevention, abstinence and social skills training, is necessary, but not sufficient. Successful treatment for sexual compulsions ultimately depends on a depth-approach that can ameliorate the underlying attachment disorders and manifestations in adult intimacy. Literally, a new pattern of way of attaching needs to be “carved” into the brain – the person learns a totally different model of relating.